October 15, 2011

Our flyer is now completed and plans are in the making for the next ShakitKura Healing Lounge to be held on Saturday, November 12th at Flying Yoga Shala in Oakland, CA.

Our first event was most successful. We had so many people come out and share their energy and grace with us. Not to mention the wonderful healers who offered body work, acupuncture, astrology readings, custom flower essence readings, sound healing and natural food vending!

We are gearing up for the 2nd ShaktiKura and event details can be found on facebook by clicking the word, OOooOOoooOOOOOH!

Entrance is just $10 and tips are suggested for bodywork sessions.

If you like this post, please share it!

September 23, 2011

Comet Elenin and The Comet Elenin Diner, now open!

Have you heard about Comet Elenin set to make its orbit next week?
Locals and many bay area astrology enthusiasts are talking nonsense which ranges that it's travel through our solar system will create certain doom, to conspiracy of President Obama's hiding in a bunker on September 27th, the day it's supposedly closest to Earth. 

Others more middle ground are blaming the comet presence on recent disputes and flares in their current relationships...

Comet Elenin Diner
Although one thing you may not have heard is about the new all organic vegan diner opening on the comet. Owner and aliens from the potentially habitable super-Earth, officially called HD 85512 b decided to take refuge on the comet and start a business in the attempts of creating interplanetary cooperation.

All food is sourced locally from the planet and includes native plant-based morsels like their vegan critter-crawler wraps to their tossed kurilian salad infused with blue-green and red pigments from the oil of their prized boo-boo-gee seed.

Owners Max and Starlight Shwartz-Kleinfelder are optimistic on the opening of their diner, properly called, 'Comet Elenin' and have began a soft-launch to nearby planets and constellations on the comets' path.
"We're hopeful the word gets out and centian beings from all over can come and enjoy a meal together in peace" says Max Kleinfelder.

The unbroadcasted announcement of the diner has already been picked up on earth through feeds, tweets, posts and updates.

Although recent talk from Earth's NASA that the comet is breaking up in space doesn't worry the Kleinfelders, "We're gonna make it all the way back to HD 85512 b!"

Although they aren't sure how to get back just yet, and again, remain optimistic.

July 17, 2011

Chapter Close.

I think I'm going to change my blog title and content, for the second time since it's incarnation over a year ago.

I'm settling into living in the bay now. Not wandering around on this house-to-house adventure any longer in search and in hopes of moving, maybe, to Los Angeles.

L.A. story is complete.

So, even though that my life is totally vibrant and full of color, with rich interactions and meandering turns without myself even knowing where I may get whisked away to next--I'm staying put. But that's to say I will still be wandering around they bay and I'm going to change my blog/website up.

Now the question is what shall it be called? What am I up to now? --That I do know. Integration.

Last night while laying in bed to the dark blue-grey light settling into my room as the sun's setting passed I had a realization... And it moved me! I feel the last 4 years of moving around and searching is coming to a close. Since I left Philly in October of '07 to now; living in New York, New Jersey, Hawaii and California. Going from job to job to job. Starting projects, destroying projects, starting projects and tearing down the walls. I was hurt and frustrated that the inspiration would leave and the desire to work with my ideas and plans never surfaced, never rooted. My heart broke repeatedly. I continued to dance and discover, play and heal. Endurance was built, patience, trust and faith that some-thing would show up eventually b/c my heart is committed to making a difference. I never gave up on that knowing.

Coming to California was an experiment and a test all in one. An experiment to let myself go, completely unwind and free to enact OUT the stuff that was showing up IN-side my heart and ego, and the patterns and past that took over my commitments to grow and be a pioneer in my world.  The test was to endure the chatter and withstand the heat and chaos of uncertainty. LA or the bay took me over. And it was just a conversation based in the past that was feeding needingly the desire to run. And run I did.

Out here it was that I distinguished how long it was that I've been running. A LONG TIME! Like, over 20 years. Since I was a kid, rebelling and fighting with the system and the flow of my life. Judging it, thinking it should be different and not giving room for me to be me.

We can now call this-complete.

Now-it's time to bring all the work forth I've been playing with and experiencing on deep levels to the surface to build and grow. Stability never looked so good. It's something I can feel inside myself, a deep knowing that a period is ending. The period of my marathon run. I've reached the finish line of that race, and now am setting foot for a new journey, a journey of long endurance, a nice hike meandering around a path that still may be unclear, but I've got a walking stick and soon a guide to walk with, slowly, steadily, building and rooting into myself. The journey of working. Working my job, working with my art, working with people in relationships and sticking around!

It felt good to feel that. Real good. LIke, REally GOod!


June 29, 2011

Staying Put

So I'm gonna stay in the bay. After a rough week in LA and realizing that my community is right here, right now it came to me on the I-5 North drive to sunrise on my way back up here that this is my home.

So I'm not sure when I will be living in Los Angeles if at all? I am still open to it but one thing that is ringing true for me right now is to get myself grounded and start making money and being of service to my community, stepping up; which is something that came to me in Vipassana very strongly.

So I am now wanting to be of service for peoples health and wellness and am offering donation-based health counseling.

I will give you a session and a half (90 minutes-$150 dollars of value) for any amount you wish to pay.

Learn more about your health and how to become healthier and stronger on your own food journey by learning macrobiotics, ayurveda and chinese medicine principals along with energetics of food and seasonal eating and cleansing techniques.

Whatever is needed for your own unique 'bioindividuality' -which means your own unique you-ness, we will discuss and go over so you can gradually incorporate healthier options into your day without guilt or worry.
If you would like to take this step, the paypal button below and on the right side tool bar of this blog and you can make any donation. I will then contact you and send you a health history to be filled out and we will schedule a time to talk or to meet in person.

I'm here for you!


June 16, 2011

Surrendering In The Void

When it hurts, and there's pain.. find the space between identifying and understanding.. towards nothingness, no-thing, no me, no my, no I, no mine.. and create awareness and practice being there.. Surrendering inside this nothingness, in the void that isn't self or identity, it's just space-present moment-now.


June 11, 2011

Sat Down and Shutted Up

  Pablo Picasso marked the beginnings and endings of his periods with trips and time away from his usual surroundings. I feel like I just left my blue period behind and am into a new space. 10-days silent will do that to ya. Yes, you! I'm not going to speak personally on this one because I feel that most people who enter the space of Vipassana come out the other end transformed in some way or another.

This is my experience, what little I can share with you, at Vipassana, a 10-day silent meditation retreat.

Have you ever sat most of the day, in silence, focusing on breath and practicing observing sensations in your body without making them mean anything? Probably not. Opportunity knocks.

It was an opportunity. That's the word I keep using; Opportunity. To have the pleasure and sometimes pain of seeing yourself in such a real way. There's no hiding out in Vipassana, it's you and your seat cushion-all day.

Well, most of the day but even that occurs like all-day, most of the time.

I was scared on the drive over, meandering through the desert hillside of Southeastern California. I had no idea what I was walking into but I knew in my heart I was ready to clear out the clutter. Arriving at the SCVC (Southern California Vipassana Center) in 29 Palms, CA and walking onto the campus that I would call home for the next 10 days and 11 nights was a surreal experience. The first night, which really is 'Day 0' we were allowed to talk until about 8pm when the first meditation took place which would carry the space of noble silence all the way through Day 10's morning. I made some chit-chat with my roommate and some guys in the dining hall during dinner.. But got the feeling most of us didn't want to talk. People were ready to go silent and go deep.

And really I coasted into Day 1, 2, 3 and into Day 4 with little hardship. The only part that was difficult was getting used to sitting, in which we had three group sits for 1-hour each every day. The rest of the time was for us to be in the Meditation Hall at our own leisure and later diligence to get what we each respectively came for. I would walk the paths a lot during the day, making rock scultpure's of fish and comets.

I watched the animals meander around the desert floor, the birds play and sing-songfully to each other and the ants working tirelessly, also in silence and in complete cooperation. I learned a lot by watching nature. After a few days that's all I could really do to pass time. Everything slowed down. There weren't a lot of thoughts entering my mind like there usually were pre-Vip.

My senses heightened. I heard animals and sort of embodied one as I would patiently sit in the desert watching, listening and learning about how an animal just is what it is. How a tree just is. A mountain just is, and all have no trouble just being what they are. Why is being human so difficult sometimes? When someone sneezed in the meditation hall, I felt the sound-wave ripple through my ear into my head. I smelled breakfast coming out of my pee in the morning and I felt more at peace and gratitude than I have in a loonnng time.

On the 4th day we learned Vipassana and in one two-hour meditation block scanned the body of sensations and thoughts that arose with them. At the end my body was humming. Vibrating so loudly, with so much sensation. My legs probably fell asleep, my arms were made of granite. My chest pounding. For me it was before some of the other teachings that would eventually release me of making the sensations mean something about me. I guess that's the best way I can put it. I took it personal, like when you have a pain you react-you took it personal. Or when you have a pleasure filled sensation, you react as well-although it is pleasurable you still take it personally. I felt a spinning wheel in my solar plexus, I got nauseous, I was scared. I backed away not knowing what was happening to me and found myself, actually just observed myself shaking in front of my eyes. For 30 minutes I shook until at tea I pulled the bag out of my cup and the seizing stopped literally as I my fingers touched water. I still can't explain it but feel I touched my pain center... whatever that means.

Vipassana is the practice of purifying the mind, the ancient technique taught by Gautama Buddha. It's an art form really; to observe sensations arising and passing away in the body, constant sensations, constant thoughts, constant constants. Everything is impermanent, Anicca, always rising and passing away. To sit and learn Vipassana is the act of watching and observing these sensations without attaching a story-line to them. This one is good, OUCH-uncomfortable-I wish that would go away, damn that annoys me, I like this feeling...Oohh, Wow, my third-eye activating, I can feel the concentrated sensations on my forehead! I'm so spiritually connected!~  As Miles Davis said, so what?

To observe all of this and catch myself enacting the attachment of thought-to-feeling was astounding. And alas, the teaching of Vipassana is to observe just that. To recognize that it's always changing, that the feelings CAN'T be mine because they don't stick around, it's not a personal thing, Anata. And to be able, which really is a practice-enabling is.. to be able to just solely observe all of this, letting the constant force of the universe and nature, Dhamma, just naturally flow, flow, flow... Well, that's a beautiful thing. We are just witnesses in this life, WOWWW~  I'm so excited right now and so feeling this. To be able to live our lives as witnesses.. Oh man! What a notion (conceptual).. What an experience..  Yes!

Vipassana also is the experience of actualizing substance. Feeling, on a deep conscious and unconscious level - the mind. I think I read on a 'Yogi Tea' label once that 'wisdom becomes knowledge through experience.' It's one thing to be an academic, to be wise and knowing. But to experience our own mind and the power and learnedness inside of it, to see what we preach and teach and demonstrate to others FREE of the ego-meaning when the mind is ego-less for a moment and no thought is there, we can open up and be authentic with ourselves because you can't fake it anymore. The ego has gone missing and the cosmic mirror is placed right in front of you.

But why do this? The Buddha taught that in our suffering as humans we are conditioned to feed the cravings, avoid the aversions and attach to feelings, and often with malcontent. Why do we steal, lie, cheat, cut corners, hide truth, self sabotage, over indulge, be excessive and manipulate? We trained ourselves to; from childhood the mind has been making meaning and morphing its' identity to avoid pain and get what it wants. So, at the root level, we suffer. The rub is most of the time we aren't aware that being these ways cuts us off from love and compassion, which makes us feel good and provides healing for ourselves and others. Vipassana is a way to go down and weed-out the impurities so we may be loving, compassionate, peaceful and a contribution to the world. It's to be of service, selflessly serving others so they may be at peace and be happy.

It was said that Jesus, upon being crucified had love and compassion overflowing from his heart. Literally while dying and being nailed to a cross he was experiencing love. He knew his captors were miserable people who didn't know any better, and b/c Jesus was an enlightened being he died the way he lived.

So, Vipassana is the the practice in the art of living, and the art of dying. People who regularly meditate and are committed to living a transformed, peaceful life of service are happy at their death beds, ready in the moment for what comes next, just like in life right now-moments arising and passing away, all is impermanent and there is nothing to hold onto.

I could write endlessly about this experience in the desert and all the profound happenings. And Vipassana was also hilarious.

Oh, the things I observed, like this one man who every night before the 6pm meditation would open the two small windows closest to his seat, only to watch them be closed by an elderly man who came in after him and sat in a chair directly underneath them. Just to be a witness and watch the whole situation go down was priceless, and it happened every night! That alone was better than anything I could watch on tv.

Because at Vipassana, despite there pretty much being only meditation, walking, sleeping and eating that takes place-all in silence and without any body language or eye-contact, texting, phones, computers, ipods, pda's, etc.. There really is A LOT of content rich with color and vividness, and none of it can be discussed. And the content is rich considering the context of the situation you're in. When laughter broke out on the 8th day, uncontrollable laughter for myself included b/c someone farted, oh man, what a release and so much joy. I got in my bones, in the deepest part of my core that a fart will go down as the funniest sound that has ever been created and experienced by man. I don't know what it is, but they are funny! But they're only funny in groups. A lonely fart is just that, it's lonely, and they like an audience. And-you can't talk about it.

Beautiful and odd moments too; The sunrises and sunsets, the skies and clouds that were witnessed were moments of timeless silence shared by us all. It was like we were all in this dream, dreaming together and watching things happen for the first time. Couldn't talk about it.

When this mysterious bright orange light appeared in the sky one night that a few of us were around to look at it, we couldn't talk about it.. I mean, is that an alien ship? I don't know and I have to shut up about it.
Dammit. Oh, I just reacted.. back to work.

Vipassana is so simple it's brilliant. Anything that happens is an opportunity-there's that word again, to look at yourself and what you experience within everything that happens outside of us, because in that meditative state of noble silence, it's so apparent to observe the mind when something remotely distinct happens.

I had this one moment where I found this quartz in the desert and brought it with me in my pocket. I did that with lots of rocks, mostly every day and would sit with one in the meditation hall. So this quartz fell out of my pocket one afternoon and I forgot to pick it up. An hour later realizing this I caught myself hook, line and sinker saying to myself, 'My rock!' Then it hit me. My rock? Why is it mine? What is mine? I didn't even know of its existence all but two hours ago and now it somehow belongs to me and it's become 'mine'? Funny huh...  Who really is 'you'? Who's me? Who's my? And for the love of Goenke who the heck is 'I'? All really good inquiries.

S.N. Goenke, btw, is a Burmese man who at some point brought the teaching of Vipassana back to India where apparently it wasn't being practiced authentically for years. And the guy took India by storm and we have today a world where Vipassana is being taught and paid for by the students who have preceded a guy like me coming into the course. Two meals a day, nice accommodations and top-of-the-line life school teaching all for a suggested donation of $100. It's non-dogmatic, scientific and universal in its teaching. You just sit with yourself. That's it.

Goenke is the Tony Robbins of the east. He's charming, funny, inspiring and brutal in the sense that he is the teaching. But he's jolly too, brutally jolly. No messing around here, "the teaching will liberate you from misery, and most people are miserable". But when he says misery he doesn't mean the kind of dismay that reaks to be around... he means the kind of misery that sneaks up on you when the last slice of pepperoni was just taken by the guy in front of you. It's the kind of misery that has you pray you don't run into your annoying neighbor every time you step outside. That's the same misery that then has you be excited and happy b/c you didn't run into your neighbor. They both feed each other. When you're happy that something didn't happen that you thought would you only solidify it's roots. It's the vicious cycle of your habitual nature that keeps you safeguarded and secure from all things your mind wants and doesn't want every day. Traffic; now that's a source of misery. You are miserable when there's traffic and you tried to beat it, but didn't, and that misery is fed by a craving of no traffic and an aversion to traffic. Then you are happier than you've ever been when you beat the morning or evening rush-hour. It all feeds the same source of wanting/not wanting, craving/aversion, good/bad. You become a slave to yourself.. or your mind actually. And that's how we live, that's how we die. And it's filled with suffering.

Vipassana was the space where I taught myself how to live and how to die. I can remain balanced in the face of traffic and remain equanimous by the pushes and pulls that happen in so many moments like at the family dinner table, or do my best at the very least. And you get that teaching downloaded all by sitting and watching your respiration, observing the sensations in the body that rise and pass away and learn not to hold onto them like they're yours, because they're not. And of course the thoughts; they never go away.  I just observe them and return to sensation and breath, the thoughts subside, slow down... and cease for a but a few precious moments hopefully ending years of conditioned thinking about pain and pleasure and curing your need for anything outside of yourself where the ultimate goal is enlightenment-freedom from suffering.

And the moments of clarity that did come to me, forget about it~ It was weird,... it's like I got clear by not thinking. Stuff would just come to me. Like moving to Los Angeles, practicing health counseling again and teaching yoga. The sound I want to create for my next didgeridoo album, relationships and how to be a better brother!

It all rises and passes away, knowing that doesn't mean anything. Being that does. And yes, you really should do this at some point in your life, because you will die, how is up to you. Here's the link.


June 09, 2011

Vipassana Updates are coming!

Damn yall,.. 17 page views today and yesterday.. the world is waiting for my updates.. it's coming.. by the weekend-promise.


May 23, 2011

In Transit

It felt good to leave the bay.. I arrived in NoHo this morning.. (not north of houston either) That's North Hollywood on the Greyhound at 6:30am.. Went to Starbucks to wash the bus off me and wait for the wee elf that was coming to scoop me up.

Got scooped and now in Escondido, a town that I still don't know the exact whereabouts of where I am geographically,... although, again at a Starbucks using the internet while the wee elf is working. Soon we'll be headed to Poway, the deserts of San Diego for a few days before the great sit begins..

I keep thinking.. If you go on your journey, keep going until you are ready to stop. The bay has been a nice incubator for me.. I've enjoyed the comfort of the transition. And- I know there is more for me to see and experience.. like the wind, I must let myself go with it. Werner would apparently say (b/c I wasn't born yet to see him) 'ride the direction the horse is going.'  I feel that.

It's kinda also like that saying, 'The journey of 1000 miles begins with a single step.' Well, if you're going to go on that journey-don't stop at mile marker 317. It's easy to become complacent and turn around, or just stay put.  Fear lurks in the shadows and the more I put myself out there into the wild the greater the light grows, and the greater the darkness is revealed... Just how far into the vastness can we go into ourselves and into the world?...I feel it's endless AND there is an end for us,.. it's when we say we're tired, or it's time, or whatever/whenever. The lesson here; if you need to go-go, and make sure you you keep going because only you know what's inside that is calling to become expressed.

It's all so paradoxic at the same time, for instance-let's take Forest Gump; The guy just felt like running! Don't be haters, cut the guy some slack-he was following his bliss. But one day he just realized, in the moment-it was time to turn around. That's knowing thyself, at least for me it is. He didn't say to himself, 'gee, i should keparadep on going because i have all these people behind me who are counting on me, some of which just joined the ride back in so-and-so. I should at least go to the ocean again, you know-for them!' 

Nope. He just chose to stop and turn around. I'm somewhere in all of that above... somewhere.


May 22, 2011

On My Way Back Home~

If home is where the heart is, then I'm on my way. Starting this Wednesday I'll be heading into a silent meditation retreat at Joshua Tree. That's no talking, texting or anything of the like for 10 days. I'm using this time to get myself clear... With so many distractions in the world today, like Judgement Day yesterday (we made it!?), Facebook, noise pollution, television commercials, the millions of people that surround us and all that chatter in our minds, it's going to be a true vacation to sit in silence for really, the first time in my life.

It's kind of hard to imagine that in my 33rd year I haven't even spent 1-day in silence and I'm jumping into 10! I can't wait. It's been an adventure of a life so far and to tell you all the truth, I am getting tired. I've lived in 10 houses since last September split between New York and California. I got the feeling to come out here last May after Hawaii and the location astrologer (julian lee-link to site) was the final push for me to come out here, although as many of you know it was his recommendation to go to LA. 

Initially I gaffed at that idea and after visiting a few times now it's become more of a possibility. And, I love the bay area too. I've been wondering if I'm at a place in my life now where I can love wherever I'm at, b/c that's what's been happening. I love it up here, I think I could love it down there.. I don't really think its the location of our homes that dictates how happy we are in life, not invalidating our locals by any means. I just mean our happiness and love for our lives, for me, comes from being present and fully accepting where we are in the moment. This is my medicine.

Any other internal chatter that we should be living someplace else or we don't want to be living where we are right now is just that-chatter. And it takes us away from seeing and being appreciative for what we do have. The meditation is a chance, maybe once in a lifetime chance to quiet the mind and be all heart. So, I'm going home, to my heart so I can listen fully without distraction on what it wants, which is to say-what I want.

I'm going to the desert, to the stillness and clarity that the desert provides to go home, inside my heart, where I've been having to find my center repeatedly over the last year or so to get myself clear; Where to live? What to do? All the questions that many of us dare to ask and few dare to answer. Because answering these, as Matisyahu says in his song 'Silence' "I will crush my fantasy on how this life is supposed to be" means that we may find answers that we don't think are really us, that maybe we are avoiding or resisting becoming but we know we really are. Crush the fantasy and become who you really are. 

He also says in the song which I'm going to have to post now is "bring my broken heart to an invisible king with the hopes one day he might answer me..."  The invisible king is us and it's silent b/c the king energy or archetype resides for the most part hidden and governs over our actions in the most noble of ways if we can access it or even identify our inner king. The heart is broken repeatedly over a lifetime and after a while we live to protect it which is no way of living, we start to become inauthentic in our actions and in our lives. If we can access our inner guides, our inner king or queen energy we can shine our hearts into the world in action and being w/o the risk of it being broken or us wounded. The inner king is your highest power of yourself, your true self that no one can mess with, and it's a state of being that only you can connect with.


After the silent meditation I intend to go somewhere and reside. It's that simple for me. Because I want to now. And I also know that I have no idea what I'm going to come up with during this sacred space I'll be in, but I'm ready. See ya in a few weeks.


May 12, 2011

Didgeridoo Album is in effect!

So much for not following through~ 

I have completed the first round of my didgeridoo album making, I have 6 tracks recorded as a 'demo' that I am selling to raise money for the completion of the editing and mixing, artwork and packaging.. $10 suggested donation gets you this weird but shamanic cd complete with me on didg, percussion and beatbox, and friends on crystal singing bowls, guitar, native flute, electric violin, synth loop pads and harmonium.

It's been an amazingly fun process and my soul has been expressed in so many ways throughout.. So now I'm proud that I will have a completed project sometime this summer. 

Order right here~ 

May 09, 2011


Hey all..

In any great transition, there are many small transitions that take place. Paulo Coelho says in The Warrior Of The Light that any great battle is won by a series of small battles that go seemingly unnoticed, then the warrior manages to triumph 'all of a sudden', surprising even him/herself and is being free from blame for having taken so long to arrive. Am I in a battle?

You bet.

The journey has been epic, and it's getting personal. Many houses, jobs, even a few girlfriends, which really surmount to my own capacity to be in and out of relationships as I learn along the way. In short, it's been a journey of the mind and a journey of the heart; a journey of spirit and of freedom. As I have watched myself untangle from life in New York/New Jersey, it's been purposeful. I wanted to come out here and let myself go.

Interesting that this is what I have wanted and now it's no longer serving me. Essentially I have been 'riding the fence'... watching myself go from job to job, scaling down to what works for me, which are 2 p/t flexible jobs. I have lived in eight different homes in six months. Yeah, I'm tired of it. It's been me looking on both sides of the fence of settling down, settling in, AND the other side of letting all of that go for some other way of life that I know is possible but am having trouble finding it.

I've discovered that it's now time to go on another journey. A journey inward. My new roommate Allan, who is a Siddha Yogi says that I have great skill at being external, connecting to the outer world, but little resource internally for being centered. I concur. The last month living here with him in his quiet, meditative house has shown me all of my inner chatter and just how little ground there has been. I've been seeing things way more clearly and am now ready to confront all the stuff inside that has been pulling me along for some time now.

It's said that when the student is ready, the teacher appears. Well everyone has been my teacher lately; The bike mechanic, the new lady in my life, my roommate Allan, EVERYONE.

So now that I've said all of this what I really want to say is that May is my month of transition. I'm coming back (and am now back) to the east coast for 10-days and then at the end of the month will be traveling down to Joshua Tree for a Vipassana Meditation, which is a 10-day silent sit.

I feel I'm more unclear and unknowing what the answers are.. and I kinda like that. I feel better being in the question without having to find the answers and learning how to be centered in this great mystery.


April 19, 2011


That would be a funny title of my new album?.. My new album.. not quite used to that one yet and I'm curious to know how it will sound once finished.. Right now we have about 37 tracks. Obviously way too long for a cd and a lot of the tracks are experimental music and sound..

There are a few gems though and I'm looking forward to finishing up the editing process so we can move ahead and have a product.. (by we I mean me, myself and I.. well wait, thats not true. Leif is the man and is my sound engineer).

2.) I think I'm going to do a kick-starter project to fund the completion of this, and help pay for cd jackets, labeling and the mixing process which I'll need to go back into the studio for.

One thing is for certain that makes me chuckle.. And that's while I spend all this energy on figuring out where I'll be living, where I'll be working, who I'll be dating, etc, etc, etc.. the one thing that is staying true is me and my didgeridoo~ Meaning, instead of focusing on what's not there or what i think should be happening with my life, maybe i'd want to pay attention on what is happening, and thats making shamanic, earth sounds with the didg' and playing in yoga classes.

This is what is actually happening with my life right now. 'Nuff said. I keep on marching.


April 06, 2011

In the studio

On Monday I went into the studio to begin the process of recording my very first album.. I'm super stoked~
I didn't have to search far and wide either, .... My neighbor two doors down from me has a recording studio in his house.. I love West Oakland... Leif makes his own pedals and tours and records and teaches.. such a great life.. His studio and business is called Structure Sound

It's something I've always wanted to do and I love this new and recent follow through I'm experiencing in my life. It makes me wonder why everyone doesn't do what they've always wanted? I don't even care how the cd turns out- i'm lying. Really though, the process is dynamic and is offering me this amazement that is my life right now.

I fully intend on carrying that intention through til I die.. til the very super sweet end I'm going to experience myself living the life I've always wanted, doing what I've always said and at least practicing contentment at whatever shows up.

As for the cd.. initially I wanted it to be this meditative, cosmic yoga-ee cd that could be played in savasanas at the end of class or when people are meditating, getting bodywork, what have you.. And the process is turning out to be this groovy, percussive, dancey, meditative cd.  I brought in Stephanie who is a healer who makes pretty jewelry and plays crystal singing bowls, Ayla who is a beautiful vocalist and guitar player, and me! I play didgeridoo and also did some mouth vocal-beats and percussion.

I listened to the tracks today and while some need some work, there is this spirit and play that's present in the music. I was listening to it on the way to and from work.. so sweet.

Next I'm going to complete it by bringing in Michael and another Stephanie who play flute and harmonium.

What have you always wanted that you haven't let yourself do yet? You know you're going to die someday... Not trying to frighten you, but you better get connected to that thought now and git yer butt in gear if you've been putting stuff off.

Live boldly.


March 30, 2011

Skype Didgeridoo Lessons at LA Outback

On the homepage for LA Outback.. didgeridoo business supreme! It was a total surprise for me to see this and that's what they intended... I guess I'm in the didgeridoo world even more now..

Skype Didgeridoo Lessons at LA Outback

March 25, 2011

Im 32

Woot~ Im 32.. Happy Birthday to me! (you be good to Brandon!)

Thats what a dear person in my life said to me yesterday.. it was a tough birthday, with so many choices and options right now.. I was feelin it.

We take life so seriously you know? I mean I can only speak personally here but im sure you can relate, right? From our careers, to our paintings, what to order off the menu, which yoga class to take, whatever.. we get in our heads. I was in my head.

I just returned from LA, and LA Outback, a supreme didgeridoo company wants me to work with them, then I got a new job up here in SF (recession?) and trying to sort out all of that, move at the end of the month, figure out my tattoo and try to get my cell phone charged so i can call moms, i was feelin it!

That's when an angel with wings swooped down and looked me straight in the eye and said, "You be good to my friend Brandon!"

Ease up.


March 11, 2011

Online Busking

I woke up today with a great idea. It got me straight out of bed on this beautiful day in Oakland to write this and lead to what you are reading right now. You see, I love playing the didgeridoo. And I play it on the streets and busk. Last Tuesday I played at the Berekely Farmers Market and made a little under $20.

The money didn't matter though, it was who I got to be that did. I felt alive, out there (in the way that I felt connected and part of life, like I was creating something), inspired and taking charge of my life, how crazy that may sound I don't know b/c I was just playing music on the street, but that's how I felt.

Kids would just sit down in front of me, mezmorized by the the undulating, cavernous sounds of my new didgeridoo in the key of 'B'. It garners a beautiful snake along it and as I weaved my hand in a snake-like way created more of the dreamtime atmosphere, something that every child who passed latched onto. I just adored myself and my music and these precious little kids who are so young and vibrant, full of energy and so curious to learn about every super cool thing that passes by them.

Now, I'm inspired to do this online busking post. I'm busy out here creating and am about to start a major project in my life. I will do it, that I am 100% clear about. What's been great about being out in California for me is that I no longer care about getting it perfect. That stopped me before. So now, a few weeks shy of my 32nd birthday I'm about to embark on a business that is sure to change the way natural food product companies are viewed.. but i'll have to keep it a bit secretive for now..

In the meantime, back to this online busking.. I'm trying to raise some funds so I can come back to the east coast in May to visit friends, dance with my 5-rhythms community and attend a wedding of my homeboy from childhood...What do ya think? If you like what you see, please feel free to drop a few dimes in the bucket, or not. Either way I am happy to share~


March 08, 2011

Settling In...

And now it's time to slow down a bit and settle in.

I always preferred that to 'settling down' anyways... I've been living around the bay area in 7 different houses now. Have had about 4 jobs and of course have been wandering around in my mind and in my heart for the entire duration.

But now things are shifting.

I'm getting tired of doing the same thing over and over again.. yes. It's insane. Not what I'm doing but to the extent of which I'm doing it, .... yes, it's insane. When I left New York.. (new jersey) 141 days ago I was willing to let myself unfold into the mystery. Or, in other words, let myself go,...err, I mean I wanted to let whatever was at the core of my wandering play itself out so a location could be found.

I knew I had to leave. Leaving always forwarded my process. Picasso marked his periods endings/beginnings when he returned home from being away. I remember in 2004 when I bought my 1995, forest green Ford Ranger-XLT and traveled the states in it for 8-months I came back to Philly newly.

Location is being found out, right now. It doesn't feel like 141 days. It feels almost, timeless... the presence of being in the journey and myself at the same time as I have been watching myself let go of layers which were unable to be cast aside while being stuck are now leaving.

I'm drawing more.
I'm dancing a lot more.
And I'm following my word.

I think sometimes, 'could I have grown like this if I were still in nj/ny? I think not. For me it takes a drastic shift to accomplish the progression I need. I mean, maybe I could have done it in nj/ny.. in fact I'm sure I could have.. I just didnt want to. And besides, I'm impatient... I'm an Aries. I'm an artist-I live like on.

All the things I've been wanting to do with my life are starting to sink in, settle in and really right now IS the only time to move forward. I'm tired of watching my word fly away while the layers of my past stay and stay.

So because that past and old layers sway,
My true intentions and dreams are being layed.

I'm just pourin' the concrete
on my dreams' foundation.

I'm settlin in
and am in my dreams vacation.


That being said I think I'll stay here and move into a home w/ the intention of living in it for more than 30 days.
I've got big things envisioned for the rest of my life... starting now.


February 15, 2011

Time to Forge Ahead

You know when you can see a pattern repeating over and over again.. man does it get annoying! So here I am again, w/o a job, gotta find a new place to live in a few weeks, money running out...

I am not upset by this. I'm just tired of it.

I've been here before and have built my life up around me to support my lack of material. I know I am strong. I am unattached to being 31 and not having certain things that others in my life have. I don't care that I don't have a house. I don't care that I'm still single. I don't care that the path ahead of me is misty... Why? Because the mist is rising.

I've spent my life digging inside. I've been digging and have struck gold many times. I took chances, moved out here, and have been a part of special, magical amazing endeavors and communities. I found the didgeridoo. And most important out of all of these things is I've found my own dance.

I am now part of a global conscious dance community that I can sink into anywhere, anytime and just let myself go on the dance floor.

This is all gold to me.

NOW, it's time to end a pattern and build. With all my interests floating in front of me, I know I'm an artist and I know in my core that I'll be pro at whatever it I choose to move ahead with...

So this comes as a bit of surprise as I'm about to import Kava from Hawaii and package my own blends of this inspiring, uplifting and calming herb. I'll mix it with greens, I'll mix it with chai spices.. I'm gonna move ahead and let it lead me to where ever it does.. because there's lots I want to do. I want to make and record music, I want to perform, I want to dance with companies and create my own form of ecstatic dance classes, I want to be an entrepreneur.

I want the world... actually, I want to be IN the world, out in front, being seen and being me. I know it's cliche, roll with it.


February 11, 2011

Yellowbox Eucalypt.

The next didg' has been acquired.. Proud to say after traveling to 4 different locals
from LA to Ojai back to the Bay to Oakhurst (near Yosemite) I found my didg today,
a Yellowbox Naiuwa [n-eye-oo-ah] Family Didg...

It's low, deep and resonant... cosmic sounding, meditative and trancy..

It's what called to me.. I am totally stoked.  It doesn't quite look like this one, although it does have a snake on it.. b/c the sound slithers all smooth-like~

Now I have to do some oil curing work to seal the inside so it doesn't crack like my last one did
b/c i never knew how to care for it.. ANd the old didg can be saved and will be badder than ever
when Im through with it's transformation.

Sleepy now.. gonna rest up mates~


February 09, 2011

The Didg' Is Gone.. The Didg' Has Gone Away~ (or has it?)

Crack. Bang. BOOM!

That was the sound of my heart breaking open.. and as Cjay said, "Only a heart broke wide open can contain the whole world?"  

It was also the sound of m'didg slipping away from my hands, down the steps (like, cruising down the steps) and slamming into the banister at the bottom of the landing. The force created a 3-foot crack running up the didg' rendering it IMPOSSIBLE TO PLAY!!!


No more didg to play!

My initial reaction was to fly to Australia and find an new one. It was the path I took ten years ago to find my 'oh-so-special Australian Ironwood Eucalyptus dideridoo, so why not again?

Ah.. flights, floods, money.. I'm grounded for now.

So the next best idea was to head to LA to hunt for new didges.. So I went walkabout with m'good mate Darius Jaeger. I went to La Outback-check. Nothing there that called to me. I went to the Elevate house in Ojai and met Adil who had didges to sell... I thought this is Kismit for sure, but his didges didn't call to me either. Then Darakshan (the man who owns the house in Ojai) sent to Rafael Bejarano, a world class musician in town. 

His didges were SUPER SWEEEET!! A bit expensive though.. so I left empty handed to go on walkabout back to the Bay with Darius. 

All this meandering, and all the time following the path of my heart.. listening to intuition. I met this really awesome man in Ojai who was at the house named Cameron Powers. He's 67 years young and still travels the world playing middle eastern music. I can go on and on about this man, but he said something I want to share with y'all.. "You either follow your own intuition or the existing paradigm." 

I thought that was a rockin' status update at the time.. and it's turning out to be my mantra for my next didg'. I'm going to wait til I find the didg' that is mine, and I'm sure I'll know it when I play it.

The surprising factoid of the trip was when I got home, and I SWEAR THIS IS TRUE, the didg's crack had actually closed up! It went from a quarter inch thick to a sliver all the way up and down..

Do you think god had other plans for me and decided to close it on it's own,.. letting me know that through my search for a new didg' I was only to return home and find my original didg' waiting for me, healing on it's own, reminding me that there is no 'other' didg'.. there is only one didg.

Now I'm going to fix it and never part with it ever!


February 01, 2011

day 104. new moon.

Bust it out
let it flow
make a mess
open up
say whats there
dont worry
be happy
go for it
or you'll never know
say hello
make new friends
extend yourself
take the initiative
stop bitching
stop complaining
let go

January 14, 2011

Are Heartstrings Meant to Be Cut?

Im feeling the grind. The spokes rubbing up against me.. Man, sometimes it's hard to get myself clear amidst the circuitry, the noise, the toxins. What do I really want? Why do I seem to hold out on everything in order to find the answer to that question. It seems obvious and easy to go with the flow, take what comes your way (in this case, my way), be in the moment and I generally like the idea that life should be a discovery.

However, my life isn't always like that.

I question a lot. A lot.


It's a beautiful day here in the bay, although I don't feel so happy today. I cut myself off from the heart, and I can feel it. And now, the broken string dangles and a void rises to the surface. Like the Woody Woodpecker float from Seinfeld that was cut (actually punctured in this case), I'm kinda hangin' off balance.

Why do we call them heartstrings? I found out there really are strings called heart or, chordae tendinae, but I don't care much for science right now...

That's as far as I'm going to go with that one for now...


January 02, 2011

I'm Selling 'Transmembrane Voltage Gated Ion Channels'

And everybody wants some of that! Call me crazy, but I'm going into the Kava business. I've always wanted to have my own natural product product, and now I'm going to do that.

I really like wanting to create something that inspires me, that seems outside of my regular or expected framework for living, and then doing it. I like just as much saying that "I did that" when I do it. It's empowering.

I am going to import type of instant Kava from Vanuatu... I don't even know where Vanuatu is, but it sounds nice.

Kava, for all you novices out there (and there are probably a lot) is a root, a plant, a nice relaxing, happiness inducing plant from the pacific islands. In many cultures they do a Kava ceremony where people gather, sit and drink. It's said that bringing Kava to a gathering like a business meeting or a family/relationship gathering will promote peace and open communication, plus it's so fun to drink b/c it numbs the mouth. That's the 'Kavalactones' or chemical compounds in the Kava that cause the relaxing.

So, keep an eye out for any introduction specials, Ill probably make a video to promote it too... The kind that I am getting is made through a special process in Vanuatu where the kava is juiced and the juice dehydrated so the Kava will dissolve almost instantly.

This is what Wikipedia has to say about the Pharmacology,


Effects of kavalactones include mild sedation, a slight numbing of the gums and mouth, and vivid dreams. Kava has been reported to improve cognitive performance and promote a cheerful mood.[12] Muscle relaxantanaestheticanticonvulsive and anxiolytic effects are thought to result from direct interactions of kavalactones with voltage-gated ion channels.[13]Research currently suggests that kavalactones potentiate GABAA activity but do not alter levels of dopamine and serotonin in the CNS.[14] Heavy, long-term kava use does not cause any reduction of ability in saccade and cognitive tests but is associated with elevated liver enzymes.[15]
Desmethoxyyangonin, one of the six major kavalactones, is a reversible MAO-B inhibitor (Ki 280 nM)[16] and is able to increase dopamine levels in the nucleus accumbens. This finding might correspond to the slightly euphoric action of kava.[17]
Kavain, in both enantiomeric forms, inhibits the reuptake of noradrenalin at the transporter (NAT), but not of serotonin (SERT).[18] An elevated extracellular noradrenalin level in the brain may account for the reported enhancement of attention and focus.

The reference to the title above has to do with electrical charges between axons and synapses in the brain, it's all very chemical...